“I'm walking towards dead end, I'm walking all alone. There's no starlight guiding my way through this downward death row. Soon will be the time I have to go.” “I'm sitting here alone in darkness, waiting to be free. Lonely and forlorn I'm crying I long for my time to come. Death means just life” .“I see angels burning, falling down in ruins. Looking down I see me, I'm my own enemy.”
“I see the candle light burning in your eyes, flaring up my eyes in flames, on this pitch-black summer night of passion and pain.” You had hope that everything was going to change, that we were going to be together once again. I didn’t know what I had in mind, but I knew that in my heart, you were mine. You thought that the pain finally was going to stop, but you didn’t know that I had an elixir up my sleeve. A beast was unleashed and all the hope you had, perished in a single second. “All was lost, reason left his mind
Chrysanthemum, his flower had died.”
Nevertheless this wasn’t always like this. There was that day at the beginning that I didn’t realize that you were thinking about me. That everything for me was normal, as usual. I was telling everyone to “Hear Me now! All crimes should be treasured if they bring thee pleasure somehow”. I was telling people to “Bring me a magic potion that will heal my aching wounds. A taste so bitter that makes my bleeding soul feel so good”. It is ironically that I meet you a day in which at 3 am I received a brunette in black stockings in my bed.
“Like the raven is black, black are the secrets in me. In flames I shall eternally burn, to purify my sinful heart. Darkness tightly holding me, the darkness is she... Throned as the night`s queen”. In that time, I felt how “The razor caressed my flesh and my arms turned red” making me “ feel a vast desire. Years of pain were flowing down my arms. Sweet, red, warm stream you drank, made me released.” And I asked you to “give me your hand, let me make you feel the ease,in the bed of razors we bleed together”. I started to see how your shadows smiled at me and how I started to kiss your shadows.
From that time you started to tell me that “There's a story in my eyes, I can see the hurt behind your smile.” You told me to “Let me know what plagues your mind. Let me be the one to know you best. Be the one to hold you up, when you feel like you're sinking”. You also told me” I walk beside you wherever you are,whatever it takes. No matter how far through all the may come And all that may go”. From there I realized that “Time is a thing we must accept.The unexpected I sometimes fear. Just when I feel there's no excuse for what happens, things fall into place. I know there is no way to avoid the pain that we must go through to find the other half that is true.Destiny is what we all seek
Destiny was waiting for you and me” .
“We stand here together on edge of eternity.In night everlasting; we two, unparted. The night is so cold, but it`s calling me, so desirous. The Full moon Watches over me from above”. “The moon is you lover, queen of the Night. Lips as red as the blood in my veins.At dawn I pray, come night: Bring her, Queen of the Night, your kiss cuts me like a razor. Hold me down and take my heart watch as I become just like you, touch me and I`ll burn like Fire.” That’s what I started to dream, but this whole dream scattered. I’m the responsible of it. I realized that two sides, that are opposed to each other, illuminate and compose a day. At the moment at which one wants to go out, the other wishes to flee. In both, the life prevails, a sunflower blooms whereas in the other a cestro yearns for to shine. Their lights will ignite a cigarette which will be consumed without the necessity to inhale it, leaving the anxieties without satiating. Without reason the brain would last; its preferential drug will not be stimulating. The reason will expired, opening a passage to the delirium that an animal feels. All to conclude that day and night are the same. But I find myself now alone. I don’t know where to go.
My story is important in the way that it is responsible of what I turned to be right now. It made me grow up and be mature enough in relation to when I have to make a choice. I believe it is not connected to Auster’s in the way that in my opinion his story is not interesting, mine is. But in more literary terms it could be alike in the way that it has a depressed tone that creates pity upon the reader but it also could be different because Auster talks about his father’s actions in relation to him, I talk about my actions in relation to my world. Also, my way of writing is a little bit more abstract, Auster's is more literal.
Bibliography :
Towards Dead End- Children of Bodom
Solitude(Candlemass Cover)- Anorexia Nervosa
Downfall- Children of Bodom
Bed of Razors- Children of Bodom
Crysanthemum- Martyrium
Cruelty Brought Thee Orchids- Cradle of Filth
Bring Me A Magic Potion- Ensiferum
Queen of The Night- Twilight Ophera
I Walk Beside You- Dream Theater
Destiny- Death
The Moon is Your Love- Twilight Ophera
